InsaneJournal

The Rec Post Of DOOM
I can't believe the number of excellent H/D fics at hd_career_fair, and I'm still very much behind the reading. There are just so many good stories that I've read so far. Here, I'm reccing the ones I think should not be missed.

♥ Greeting Expectations (H/D, R, WC: ~16,000) featuring Greeting Card Writer!Draco and Private Detective!Harry
Summary: Narcissa and Lucius Malfoy ask Harry, who's currently unemployed, to discover why Draco has apparently gone Muggle.

"That's the bitch," Pansy told Harry, her voice not much louder than a whisper.
"The b-b-b -"
"Come now, Potter. I'm sure you can say it," Blaise murmured . "Rhymes with witch."

♥ A Matter of PreText, ConText, and Misconceptions (H/D, NC-17, WC: ~15,000) featuring Sex Deviant Counselor!Draco and Barking Perv!Harry (+ one of the hottest sex scenes ever!)
Summary: Marriage suffering a slow death by silence, career taking a drastic downwards turn, Harry re-analyzes his life through one of the best methods he knows: wanking and porn and wanking to porn. It’s not becoming an addiction, it’s not.

Harry jerked, his hand flung his penis away so hard the stiff organ flopped back and slapped painfully against his stomach. If there was ever anything more awkward than your wife walking in on you rubbing one off while thinking about your therapist, Harry had yet to meet it.

♥ It’s a Dirty Job (H/D, NC-17, WC: ~9,000) featuring Chimney Sweep!Draco and Rich!Harry
Summary: Harry Potter wakes up after a night of debauchery to discover that he has a new employee.

Malfoy shivered. “Theoretically … we breathe in particles every time we travel – oh, fuck – by Floo."
Harry drew back, startled. “Fuck by Floo? Is that possible? Like talking through the Floo?”

♥ Paint It Black (H/D, PG-13, WC: ~6,500) featuring Rock Star!Draco Milo and Drunk Fan Boy!Harry
Summary: Harry’s given up on life, and Draco’s grabbing it by the throat; a most unlikely connection brings them together.

Some people pulled out a prayer mat and faced Mecca, some folded their bodies into origami in the name of yoga, and some chanted while incense burned. Harry Potter sat on his unmade bed in tatty boxers and smoked Marlboros. It worked for him.

♥ Pomegranate (H/D, NC-17, WC: ~14,500) featuring Chef!Draco and Guest!Harry
Summary: More than a decade after the War, Draco makes a triumphant return to the wizarding world as the successful chef/owner of Pomegranate, only to have his world thrown into disorder when Harry arrives unexpectedly in the dining room.

In true Malfoy fashion, this realisation did not kindle even a spark of remorse in Draco; instead it ignited an inferno of indignation. Potter had obviously written the shitty review because Draco had knocked back his advances! Just as obvious, in Draco's alcohol-addled mind, was the solution: he would have to shag Potter to get a good review.

♥ Respect Your Editors (H/D, PG-13,WC: ~4,500) featuring Advertiser!Draco and Ice-Cream Vendor!Harry (Also: 'COCKS! EVERYONE NEEDS THEM!')
Summary: Junior VP of advertising Draco is almost certainly going to lose his job over an editing fiasco with his latest batch of ads for Starry's Starry Socks and instead of freaking out at the office, he goes to vent in a Muggle park. He accidentally comes across Harry, who has become a Muggle ice cream van driver, and the two of them get to know each other again over ice cream, sherbet and a little bit of time.

"Wait, hold on!" Harry nearly tipped out of the serving window as he leaned forward. "Sorry, this is just weird, you know?"
Draco half turned back to him. "Harry Potter is an ice cream man. You save the world and decide to listen to the same little song in a chilly van for the rest of your life. I am aware of the weirdness."

♥ The Adventures of Harry Potter, Pervert, and Draco Malfoy, Porn Star (Un-Cut) (H/D, NC-17, WC: ~16,300) featuring Pervert!Harry and Porn Star!Draco Lucas Black
Summary: In Harry’s flat, Friday night is porn night, and that’s that. Then, an unexpected face pops up in Some Like it Cock, and Harry can’t get Draco Malfoy out of his head. In the end, thanks to a tearaway Teddy, Harry doesn’t have to, but neither man is willing to reveal their secret…

"Aren't you older than me?" Harry said with a laugh.
"I keep in very good shape," Malfoy said salaciously.
Harry turned around, and surprised at his own boldness, looked Draco up and down very obviously. "I can tell," he said with a smile, which he hoped was seductive and secretive and passionate, but feared was slightly creepy.

♥ Don’t Let’s Stop or The Case of the Dead Philandering Politician (A Draco Malfoy Mystery) (H/D, R, WC: ~15,900) featuring Magical Forensic Analyst!Draco and Special Agent!Potter (+ Draco and Ron shopping lingerie together)
Summary: herein Draco Malfoy is a Forensic Analyst employed by the DMLE, has an ongoing feud with Coulson who works days, irreparably frightens assistants, imbibes massive amounts of coffee and quite possibly engages in too much snarky banter with his liaison, Inspector Potter.

"Your husband is bloody fit!" the shorter one swoons, tightening her grip on Draco's arm.
The taller one takes Draco's other arm. "And he's so good with the children!"
They share a commiserating look. "Why do all the good ones have to be gay?"
Draco bites back a scathing comment. Silence is his friend in these situations.

♥ All That Remains (H/D, R, WC: ~21,000) featuring Volunteer Worker!Draco and Homeless Veteran!Harry
Summary: In a Great Britain destroyed by war and plagued by magical epidemics, those who are left behind struggle to survive and find meaning.

It takes several more tries before Draco can convince Potter to drink a few sips, then he simply sits with the other man's head in his lap for a while. He can hardly believe it, it's so bizarre: Potter wanting to die because he thought he wouldn't see Draco any more? It has to be some kind of weird dream.

♥ Incidental Charms (H/D, NC-17, WC: ~11,500) featuring Para Investigator!Harry and Inventor of DACH-Daydream Charms!Draco (You'll appreciate the fic more if you're familiar with The Administration Series by Manna Francis)
Summary: Draco Malfoy has spent the last twelve years trying to build a successful business in a post-war world where the Administration has replaced the defunct Ministry for Magic and pure-bloods' rights are almost non-existent. Now his company, DACH Inc., is under the scrutiny of Senior Para Investigator Harry Potter and Malfoy must tread carefully.

"Anyway, eager little thing. On his knees before I could even ward the door. He was at it about ten minutes and his jaw had to be aching. Funny thing, but he wasn't cutting it." Potter's fingers pressed into Malfoy's hips. "He just wasn't what I was looking for. Young and innocent and brainless. He'd learned about the war from books and the bloody Prophet. So I stopped looking at him and instead pictured that he had a snotty smirk and clever grey eyes. I added hands behind his back with I&I cuffs and was finally able to spill my load down his throat. And you know what he said after he spit his mouthful into the rubbish bin? 'Who the fuck is Malfoy?' That's what he said." Potter chuckled and bit Malfoy's shoulder.

♥ Drink Up Thy Zider: A South Hams Pomona (H/D, R, WC: ~40,000) featuring Cider Maker!Harry and Banker!Draco (This fic is quite the case; I guarantee you don't often come across H/D fics so immersed in all things British like this one.)
Summary: Harry, like Draco a widower, their children being adults or soon to become so, has retired to a South Hams village, where he farms and makes cider in a gentlemanly way, not that the Ministry accepts that he’s not a political threat. When Draco is accused of huge losses and malfeasance in his position at Goldstein & Zabini, the private and merchant bank that straddles the Muggle-magical boundary, Blaise and Pansy arrange for him to escape to South Devon whilst awaiting the investigation. Naturally, Draco’s friends – and his mother and his son – have a hidden agenda.

Draco had committed yet another solecism at tea, putting his clotted cream and jam on his scones in the Cornish order of precedence rather than in the Devonian; he had accepted correction coolly, beginning as he meant to go on. Nothing - not even the need to mask his intentions beneath an uncommon meekness - would divert him from the dicey path he must tread: he was the master of his fate, the captain of his -
'Draco!'
'Mother?'
'If you are coming to Evensong, leave wool-gathering and go and get ready. And wash: you've jam on your face.'
'Yes, mother.'